Episode 150 scene 3. Dialog between Elliot and Eli: J: Mr. Carson. Do you want that UN headline in a three quarters or an inch? EC: No, make it an inch, Jerry. The people in this town are liable to forget there's a world outside if you let them. J: That's a waste of ink. [Jerry is usually more respectful]. [Eli comes in the Clarion.] Headline on the wall PEACE Eli: Got a minute son? EC: Not really, Dad. Eli: Huh? EC: Well, what do you have in mind? Eli: Well, It can wait. It can wait. EC: No. No. No. Come on. Eli: Well, I've been wondering where are we going to put the new baby? Because Allison will be home. EC: I'm sure Connie's got something worked out. Eli: Well, I think you ought to move Allison down to the dining room and put the new baby up in Allison's room. EC: Well, we planned on redecorating Allison's room for Allison's homecoming. Eli: Oh, no, no, no. Redecorate the dining room because you always eat in the kitchen anyhow. EC: Dad, If you move an older child to make room for a baby, the older child is going to resent the new arrival. Eli: What? EC: Yes, I've been reading some books on it. And all the experts, they agree that it's a mistake to put babies into a half-right done-over make-shift room. Eli: Oh, fiddle-sticks. EC: Look, Dad. This baby is the most incredible thing that's ever happened to me. And I'm going to welcome him with pink champagne, with 50 cent cigars, with a brass band. Well here, with a proper nursery. Well, what do you think of that? Eli: Is Connie aware that you are expecting the next new king of England? EC: Now look Dad, here's the plans of the house. All we have to do is raise the west roof just a couple of feet. We'll move out the store room. And we put a bathroom in there. Eli: Cost you more that it cost Connie's folks to build the whole blamed house. EC: Now if you were my mother-in-law, you'd have a right to say something like that. Eli: But I've got a solution. EC: You're not my mother-in-law. Eli: We're going to build a sleeping porch. EC: And you're not allowed to nag. Eli: I'm not nagging. I'm serious. I'll furnish the lumber. We'll build it ourselves. Week-ends, there's still plenty of good weather. And, besides, the exercise will do us both good. EC: But I want a proper nursery like that. Eli: When you were ten years old you wanted a castle with a moat around it. But you were very happy when I built you a tree house. EC: Now look, Dad. Supposing. Just supposing you were a baby. How would you feel if your parents dumped you into a homemade shed? Eli: This is not going to be a shed. It's going to be a sleeping porch. EC: Now you would feel unwanted wouldn't you? Eli: Not as long as my pappy polished my spoon every day. EC: But grandparents are supposed to spoil their grandchildren. Eli: And fathers are supposed to be strict and thrifty. [trills r]. EC: I'll help you build that sleeping porch if you'll let me fed him with a silver spoon. Eli: It's a deal. [They shake hands]. EC: You're going to make a terrifying nanny. Episode 150, scene 3 HOME